Fostering the Family

When we began thinking about foster care, my focus was solely on being able to help children. Even knowing others who have fostered and have had kids reunited with their parents and even with all the training we received, I don't know that I was really prepared for the fact that you are not just fostering a child, you are fostering a family.

So, what does it mean to foster a family? 

It means you never say a negative word about their mommy or daddy in front of them even if you don't agree with choices that mommy and daddy have made. It means that when you talk to those parents you ask God for grace to speak with patience and respect. You learn to speak words of encouragement into that mama's life; you tell her you are proud of the progress she's making and remind her how much her babies need her to keep pressing on toward sobriety and stability. When you feel frustrated because you are questioned about your parenting decisions you (not always easily, but eventually) let it go. Fostering a family means you stay in touch with the relative who cares deeply but isn't able to keep the kids themselves, and when your little one invites that person to stay for supper you set an extra place and make it work even though you didn't plan for feeding another person. It means that you pray every day for that little one's mommy and daddy to know Jesus.

Most of all, it means that when your sweet foster child, who feels like he's yours, asks if you love his mommy and daddy, you say yes. And you mean it.